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Learn how being present and practicing with intention can help make your clients feel safe during a massage session—and why doing so is imperative to building trust.
By Jules Wyatt, August 1, 2024
Massage therapists find their way to the massage profession in a variety of ways, but one constant is the desire to help people. An integral part of ensuring massage therapy provides as much benefit as possible is creating safe space where both you and your clients understand what safe touch looks and feels like—and when resetting boundaries might be necessary.
Often, our own experience in the profession—whether we’ve been practicing for years or are just starting out—means we sometimes forget that our clients may not always understand how a massage therapy session works. We may forget that our clients don’t always understand our intentions the minute they walk through the door, and everyone comes with personal experiences that have shaped their lives. We must always account for the power differential between the client and massage therapist.
Of course, intake is a great place to learn more about our clients, but we may not get all of the information that we need, especially when clients are not familiar with massage.
Delivering safe touch can look different depending on each client’s specific needs. Any client seeking massage will have layers of history and memories that live within their muscle tissue, and some of these experiences will have been in the body for years. In many cases, the client may not have any awareness around what might trigger emotional release and memories of the past.
So, with all of these variables, how do we consistently create an environment that promotes safe touch?
Creating and maintaining a semi-permeable boundary where the client knows the therapist is approachable but also at a safe emotional distance promotes an environment that protects the client and therapist from transference or countertransference.
A semi-permeable boundary also promotes a healthy change in flows of energy based on how the client is feeling from session to session. For example, perhaps the client is very chatty in one session but doesn’t want to talk in the next. Massage therapists need to recognize and respect the boundaries their clients set from session to session.
Massage therapists must also enforce their own physical, emotional and professional boundaries.
Developing eye contact with positive body language such as nodding as the client speaks, which illustrates you are engaged and paying attention, is important. These small gestures let the client know they have the power to speak and be heard regarding their body, and the massage therapist is actively listening and validating what the client is telling them.
Repeating the information back to the client while making eye contact shows the client the information they’re sharing, which is sometimes vulnerable, is being embraced and respected. This communication also creates the opportunity for clearing up any misunderstandings while a plan for the session is being developed.
Giving clients information up front creates a sense of safety that can easily flow throughout the massage session. Many clients will only have preconceived opinions about massage, especially if you are giving them their first massage. Informing the client of massage session details before they are on the table can calm anxiety of the unknown.
Massage therapists should be clear that the client has complete autonomy throughout the session, which can help alleviate any fear or apprehension around the existing power differential. Clients who are verbally given the power to speak up and protect their autonomy are intentionally being made aware that the therapist is present and aware of the client’s individual needs.
Therapists should be accustomed to checking in with every client. Checking in should not only be limited to the amount of pressure being delivered, however, but also include assessing how safe the client is feeling.
Many clients, for example, will tense up when pressure is too deep or they would like different music, level of conversation or oil scents.
Because there is an inherent power differential between a massage therapist and their clients, many people may be less comfortable speaking up if they’re feeling physically or emotionally vulnerable.
Massage therapists should be aware that changes in a client’s behavior during a session can be a sign of emotional release, being triggered or a PTSD flashback. Massage therapists should be proactive and ask questions when noticing signs of change.
Giving the client the power to make decisions that are best for them in the moment demonstrates your top priority is creating a safe environment.
After each session, a request for feedback can be a powerful tool to educate the therapist further around safe touch. As humans, we all have our own intentions and perceptions of our actions. How they are perceived can look and feel completely different to others based on where they are emotionally and physically in the moment.
Sending a follow up email to clients checking in on them after 24 hours or so and asking what worked for them about the massage session, as well as what could have been done differently, opens the door for them to reflect on their experience and be honest.
Perhaps the music was a little too loud or maybe an artist that played reminded them of a dark time. Maybe since the last session they have decided they would rather not have a certain area of the body worked again. Whatever information is shared should be documented and implemented for the next session.
Massage therapists have the opportunity to watch their clients grow and improve from session to session, not only due to assisting in the physical treatment of the client, but also emotionally and mentally by having the honor of creating the safe space needed to encourage that growth.
There are several ways clients may subtly signal they are feeling vulnerable. A few things massage therapists can look for include:
When you notice a client may be entering vulnerable space, checking in with them can be a good way to both reinforce boundaries and show compassion:
In all of these examples, the therapist demonstrates professional yet empathetic language focused on comforting the client while protecting boundaries for both the client and themselves.
Offering water, a tissue and space are the tools every massage therapist has for the client. Another powerful tool is to offer the client to continue the massage at another time. Giving the client the power to make decisions that are best for them in the moment demonstrates your top priority is creating a safe environment.